Jessica graduated cum laude from Yale University in 2004. Following a vision of American and Chinese citizens working together, she and a friend founded the Worldview Asia Tours, which have bought programs by visiting American speakers to thousands of people in Asia. These have included lectures on The Diamond Cutter, and this year the first Chinese speakers have come to the United States to exchange to deliver their own insipiring talks.

Effortless ripening.The Diamond Cutter talks about the idea of gardening: purposely planting the kind of future you want by putting imprints in your own mind - which we do by helping others achieve what we seek.

Like most people who have actually used the teachings of The Diamond Cutter, I was able to turn my financial situation around from one of uncertainty to a lot of zeros behind the numbers in my bank account - all by providing very purposely for others.

At the same time I had been looking for a person who could be both a life partner and a business partner. I couldn't seem to find one. Lots of looking, but nothing was materializing. Then it occurred to me that I could simply use the same principles that The Diamond Cutter prescribes for finding financial security.

According to this logic, I would find my partner if I went out and actively supported other people's relationships. And so for the next year I did this, in every way I could. Sometimes it was as subtle as consciously smiling inside whenever a happy couple walked by. Or else I would purposely make time to sit and talk with friends who were having difficulties in their existing relationships.

On a business trip then to Los Angeles, I suddenly found myself in this most beautiful partnership. It was a very interesting phenomenon. I had worked very hard to create the imprints, but when the imprints actually came to flower it all seemed so natural and almost unnoticed.

It was almost a strain to realize that I had made it happen, without doing any of the things that we normally think "cause" us to meet that special someone. It wasn't that I said to him, it wasn't anything I wrote, there was no picture on a website somewhere. Just these mental seeds, quietly ripening.

It was just about two years ago I was expressing my marriage problems to a friend. He told me about a man named Geshe Michael Roach, a Buddhist monk from the USA who had written a couple of books and also was the founder of a school in America. My friend had been to classes and studying with a local Singapore group and had come across the Spiritual Partners talks on the net given by Geshe Michael and recommended that I look up the website and listen to one of the talks so I did. One of the few times I have listened to someone in my life. My wife likes to remind me that we were given 2 eyes, 2 ears and only 1 mouth for a very good reason...

The first thing I heard was, "if you are having trouble with your current relationship you don't have to quit the relationship or leave your partner", "you just have to look at them differently". It didn't sound so difficult so I listened more.

The talks weren't about who was right or wrong, they weren't about compromising or reasoning with each other so that we could be happy......my wife was empty, we were both empty. "Your wife isn't' coming from out there, she is coming from you!" he said. I was interested, I didn't understand it but I was interested still. I didn't want to change relationships... Again! I didn't want to fail... Again!

I take it back, the first thing I heard was that everything is empty, my boss is empty, my wife is empty, what was this emptiness? OH, and my dog likes to chew on this pen? Again, I didn't understand and I didn't care, I just kept on listening and eventually it saved my marriage. So did I change or did my wife change? When I started watching my wife while she slept like my new teachers told me, fault finding went away. Fault finding in a lot of things was replaced by acceptance and contentment with the way things were. We were empty.

Next I heard, "whatever you want you must make sure that someone else gets it first". If I want an ice cream cone make sure that someone gets an ice cream cone first. In my case its cookies! I love cookies! So if I wanted cookies, I had to make sure that somebody else had cookies. Even cookies come from me, not from out there.

So does that mean if I am single and I want a girl friend, do I have to supply someone else with a girlfriend first? NO, it just means that I could do something similar like for instance say, babysitting for a couple who may be having a difficult time to be together alone after their baby was born. So, on the weekends or on some other occasion you would offer to help them out. You could visit a sick friend and make him/her some chicken soup or an old person who is lonely and in a nursing home or lives alone and is lonely. Make someone else happy, and then you will be happy.

So, in the case of wanting a girl friend or wanting to have a good relationship with my partner, one thing for sure, I must never ever disturb someone else's relationship in anyway. Take away someone's girl friend; go out with married women etc. This is like the worst thing I could do if I ever hoped of having any kind of relationship.

So by now I'm looking at my wife every morning before she woke up and seeing this person like I have never seen them before! Like an angel or something. My spiritual advisor (by then I was listening to the talks over and over again) said to picture my wife as my teacher, that she is here to teach me something, patience, compassion, maybe what love is?? "Look at all of the good that she does for you, stop the fault finding," "your partner is more precious than a Wish Fulfilling Jewel!" I heard from the teacher. One more thing that I heard was that my wife was just like me, she was suffering also. In fact that every one of us were the same and we all wanted happiness and I better get to work fast and help others, do something for others if I wanted my wife back.

My heart was softening as the days and weeks went by. I had a couple of relapses in selfishness, jealousy and control issues but I learned when that happened how to bring my mind back to love and kindness and as much understanding as I could. I could usually get back on track by doing this. I didn't like the uneasiness that I felt when I lied or cheated or was angry, the absence of these states of mind was happiness!

Our relationship has evolved since then, we want to share with you. Now we both want YOU to be happy, with or without a partner, it's up to you. We just think that having a Spiritual Partner is the icing on the cake!